I read an article today entitled, "12 Ugly Things Seniors Do As They Age" and thought since I well fit into that category, I might should read it. I was appalled at the number of items that I could actually relate to. What about you? Do you fit into any of these uglies?
1. Negativity
Do your conversations either begin or contain negative feelings about the world around you, your health, your current situation, family issues, etc?
This one did hit me, because I do tend to discuss my current health issues too much and can be a "woe is me" participant when anyone asks. And after all, who really cares, so I need to just say "Fine" and let it go. I'm going to work on that.
2. Daily Appearance
Do you dress in something nice or at least appropriate every day, or do you stay in your PJs or just comfy, oversized clothing?
Getting dressed every morning has always been my habit. Although I don't always do on the full make-up regime, unless I'm going out, I try to look presentable. In my younger days, I would dress for work, thinking what if I ran into an old boyfriend. Well guess what! At the end of the day, my favorite boyfriend always came home, and I was glad I had dressed well.
Being retired and not as active as we once were doesn't mean that we can't dress for ourselves. After all, it helps our self-image if nothing else.
3. Becoming stubborn and resistant to change
It is easy to become resistant to change if we aren't challenging ourselves to explore and try new things and stay up-to-date with technology and new equipment. If we don't challenge our mind and body as we get older, then they both get stale and inflexible. I don't want that to happen to us.
4. Hoarding or refusing to clean out
I shall never forget, as a teenage girl, being asked to go with a friend to see what I might want in the house of a mutual friend who was near death. I knew the lady and had been in her home a few times, but I was not prepared for what we found. She had become a hoarder and refused to throw away anything. That meant everything from all her childhood and family treasures to the last can she had opened.
Hoarding and cluttering is not something I am inclined to ever do, so this is not a temptation to me, and I pray it never happens. I think my husband and children would have me committed should that happen.
Now back to my old friend. I actually did find a couple of items I wanted to keep. One was an old pattern book from the mid-1920s. If you are younger than 45, you may not know what that is. I think I kept it until we moved in 2000. I still like vintage things, but don't collect them.
5. Losing patience too easily
Do you find yourself getting frustrated with circumstances beyond your control too easily? What about that lady ahead of you in line who can't find her money, or the cashier who is having a bad day, or the driver who has no idea what they are doing, or the woman sitting behind you with the high-pitched voice who never stops talking? I'm getting frustrated just writing about it. Seriously, these are things that do tend to get on our nerves sometimes. What I am going to try to concentrate on is why this is bothering me so much, and how I can show kindness to this person instead.
6. Over-talking and not listening
I don't want to be that person who interrupts a conversation to share my story and do one-upmanship. As we get older, we tend to think our stories are more interesting than anyone else's. Although they may be great memories and experiences for us, not everyone is interested. Let us ask more questions of the person we're conversing with and listen to more rather than talk so much. We will learn so much more, and who knows, that person may actually enjoy conversing with us. After all, isn't that what we want?
7. Pushing people away instead of asking for help.
Allowing others to assist and help us can often actually foster connections and relationships.
8. Being too frugal to enjoy life
I am happy to say that none of my friends fit into this category, and neither do we. We love spending our children's inheritance on doing what we enjoy. Time is too short for that foolishness.
9. Talking down to younger generations
This isn't something I'm tempted to do because all my grands are much smarter than I am. Besides, they wouldn't put up with it anyway. There are times I would like to make suggestions and share from my vast storehouse of wisdom, but I've learned that unless asked, it's best to keep all that to myself.
I want to be remembered as the one who encouraged instead of criticizing.
10. Holding on to regrets and resentments
Have you ever known a bitter old person? They sure aren't who you want to be around. We just can't hold on to the past hurts and disappointments we may have experienced. Instead, pray and forgive. It might even be good to seek forgiveness for those hurts we may have caused.
11. Ignoring health issues
As we age, ailments are inevitable, and we need to be conscious of those changes as they occur. Learn the symptoms of various illnesses and seek help when you have questions. We can't just ignore problems and hope they go away at our age. Stay on top of your health. No one cares about your health more than you do.
12. Stop seeking joy and laughter
Do be a crumpy! Nursing homes don't even like grumpies.
Look for those things that make you happy and bring you joy. What is a happy place for you? Find it and enjoy it. Read good books that make you laugh. Find a silly friend who likes to do unusual things and embrace that. Listen to good music. Read your Bible and seek first the things of God and His righteousness. You can't stay joyless if you know the one who brings joy, love, and peace.
All this to say - DON'T BE AN UGLY OLD PERSON!
And, if you see me doing any of these things, tell me to straighten myself up and get over it!
